oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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