Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Then you guys just all showered together...?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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