so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
