Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
