he thought i was a dude.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
