Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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