Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
