It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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