addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
