I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize