just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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