Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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