Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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