so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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