Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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