i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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