very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
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