You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
