If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Randomize
