Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
