Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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