BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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