i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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