You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Enjoy the penises
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
