THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
