Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
