She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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