Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
