How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I need help removing her.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
