just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
