did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
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