You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize