you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize