he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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