Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
