and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Randomize