we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
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there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
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If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.