I just made out with a guy for $7.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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