margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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