there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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