so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize