Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
