i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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