Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
How does it feel to date your dad?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize