His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
