If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
