Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
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