holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
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if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
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just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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