Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
