Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
